pod ep 14 signs its time to drop a nap
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[00:00:00] Welcome to this sleep by Alex podcast. I am a certified pediatric sleep consultant and a mom of three, and I will be bringing you quick science backed sleep advice to get you and your baby or a toddler sleeping well.
Hi. Hi. Hi. Happy Tuesday everyone. Thanks for coming back yet another week.
We're coming off of a lovely 4th of July weekend.
We had such a nice time as a family, just kept it super low key and had a ton of fun family time, and I feel very refreshed and ready to go for the week.
One thing that did happen this weekend actually, is the Passy Ferry visited our house, so my two and a half year old still sleeps with his pacifiers, or he did at least, and with baby number four on the way, and arriving in just a few short months. I wanted him to have at least a couple months without his pacifiers before this baby arrives, and he has a bunch of [00:01:00] other transitions coming up, right.
I was so nervous, but I finally decided just to take the plunge and go for it. Over the weekend, jury's still out. I'm still collecting information. We are only on like day two or three here,
so I'm gonna keep taking notes on how this has affected sleep and how I've dealt with those situations so that we don't start any new habits or anything like that.
And I feel like most likely next week I'll release an episode just covering everything about how we took away the pacifiers, how it affected sleep, and your options when it comes to taking away the pacifier.
So look for the episode maybe next week or the week after, just depending on how much information I want to collect, how the rest of this week goes, when it comes to sleep, and my toddler.
So stay tuned for all of that. But this week we are actually talking about dropping naps.
During the first year of your baby's life, there are so many nap transitions, right? When there are newborns, there, naps are sort of all over the place. They may be taking 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 naps a day. And then somehow all within the first, you [00:02:00] know, 14, 15 months of their lives, they're gonna go through all these transitions, go from five naps a day, to four to three, to two to one, and that can be a little bit overwhelming.
It can feel like the moment you've got your baby on a nap schedule that works for them. All of a sudden things aren't working anymore and you're wondering if your baby needs to drop a nap, it can feel like things are constantly changing. So today I just wanna break down when we typically drop naps, what signs to look for to make sure your baby is ready, and then a few tips on how to go about dropping naps.
Now before I get into all the signs to look for, I'm first going to talk a little bit about the average sleep needs for each age. Every baby is different, okay? Some babies are gonna have higher sleep needs, others are going to have lower sleep needs. Some babies will drop naps way earlier or later than others.
So when I list these averages, I do not mean that these are rules. These are just, when we take a bunch of babies [00:03:00] and see what they're doing, these are the averages we get.
What's more important is that we're looking for signs of readiness, but we do wanna combine that with looking at what is age appropriate. For example, your five month old is most likely not ready to drop to one nap per day, even if you're experiencing some of these signs, right?
So we wanna make sure. Yes, we're looking for all these signs. Yes, it is semi age appropriate. While knowing every baby is different, these ages are not rules. These are just around where we see things typically happen.
As I sort of said earlier in the newborn months, most babies aren't going to have a nap schedule per se. They might have 4, 5, 6, 7 naps a day, just depending on how long each nap is. And how they're sleeping.
Usually, around four months is when naps start to solidify a little bit. And when I say solidify, I don't mean that it's a perfect schedule and that your baby is taking like a two hour naps in their crib or anything like that, but I just mean by four months old,
things become a little more predictable. [00:04:00] And they're usually on four naps a day By around five months old, most babies will be dropping from four naps to three naps a day.
Now the transition from three naps to two naps typically lands somewhere between six and nine months, so there's a bit of a range. Once again, we'll be talking about the signs to look for, but for the most part, the average is seven months to drop to two naps with the range of six to nine-ish months.
When it comes to moving from two naps to one nap,
the average is around 14 ish months, but it can really range from like 12 to 16, sometimes even 18 months, depending on your baby. There's a bit of a big range for that last transition to one nap a day. So once again, I'll talk about everything you need to look for to make sure your baby's actually ready
and finally to drop naps completely. The average age is three years old.
There is a big range here as well. For example, my daughter was two and a half when she stopped napping altogether, and my oldest was [00:05:00] nearly four when he stopped napping. Cal, my youngest right now. He'll be three in October, and he is not near dropping his nap, I don't think.
But three is the average age where some toddlers are going to be ready to stop napping altogether.
Now once again, those are all just the averages. So what's more important is tuning into your baby or toddler sleep needs.
I do wanna say a little caveat here. Being under tired and being overtired can look very similar. Like an overtired baby might take a short nap, and an under tired baby might take a short nap. So when you hear these signs, make sure you're listening for this main thing.
If your baby's nap schedule was working fine. And now you're suddenly experiencing some of these following signs, then it's probably under tired because it's not overtired. If the schedule was working perfectly fine, they were napping and sleeping really well, and then as they got older, it suddenly [00:06:00] stopped working, right?
Because your baby's sleep needs are naturally going to lessen as they get older, so most likely those wouldn't be signs of over tiredness.
If your baby's nap schedule has never really worked for them and you've always experienced the signs that I'm getting into, then it may not necessarily be time to drop a nap. There could definitely be other reasons that you're experiencing these things, like sleep habits, overt tiredness, et cetera.
So I just wanna make that caveat once again. These signs aren't like 100%, you should drop your baby's nap because if you've always been experiencing these signs, then most likely you have something else going on. But if things were working okay and suddenly these things start to happen, then it may be time for a nap transition.
One more caveat before I get into the signs, and I know I have like all of these. Make sure you know this before you hear all these signs. It's because I don't wanna send you off with some random signs and information. And then all of a sudden everybody's dropping their baby's naps when really their baby was [00:07:00] overtired or they were experiencing a sleep regression or they were teething.
We definitely don't want that to happen. We don't wanna drop naps if it's not. Necessary. Right? We wanna keep those naps as long as possible. Daytime sleep is so important for your baby's growth and development and for you, right? You need your baby to take breaks during the day to rest to sleep. So before you go for dropping a nap, make sure you've been experiencing one or more of these following signs for at least a couple weeks.
Okay? At least two weeks. Hang in there. If you start to experience one or more of these things. Keep your baby's routine the same. Keep the schedule the same. Keep offering their naps. When you typically would try not to start any new habits or anything that could cause these sort of regressions to stick around for quite a while, stick with the same old, same old for two weeks to see what happens.
This can help make sure it's not just an illness [00:08:00] or they're getting a tooth or they're going through a regression. If you've been consistent for two weeks and you're still experiencing one or more of these signs, then yes, okay, it's most likely time to drop a nap.
We just really wanna make sure we're not changing up baby sleep schedule because they had a wonky three, four, or five days. Really wanna make sure, is this because of their sleep needs or is this because of something else?
Okay, here is sign number one. Your baby was previously going down further naps easily, but now they're fighting their naps or happily taking shorter naps. So. Let's say your baby used to be awake for 90 minutes before they went down for their nap and used to be able to get them to sleep in, you know, five to 10 minutes.
And now all of a sudden you're spending 30 minutes struggling to get your baby down for a nap. This is a telltale sign. They're ready to extend their wake window and possibly drop one of their naps.
If your baby is suddenly fighting their nap and it's due to being under tired and probably [00:09:00] having a nap transition on the horizon, it's probably going to look like them rolling around in their crib babbling.
Or you are rocking them to sleep and they're just staring up at you looking around the room for 30 minutes right before falling asleep. Finally.
If their demeanor shouldn't necessarily be super upset or seeming really, really tired and crying and screaming, but they just can't fall asleep, that's usually gonna mean overtired. But in this situation, it's like. This nap used to work fine. They used to fall asleep easily. Now they just seem not as tired at that time, and they're taking a longer time to fall asleep
along those same lines that could go along with your baby all of a sudden taking shorter naps, but being perfectly happy about it. Maybe your baby's afternoon nap used to be an hour and a half long, and then all of a sudden it's only 45 minutes long and they're not necessarily tired or cranky after that nap.
They just seem well rested, ready to get up, and even though you try and get them back to sleep, they're just wide awake and ready to [00:10:00] go.
This can mean that they do need more awake time before you put them down for their nap.
Okay, moving on to bedtime. So another sign your baby may be ready to drop a nap is a bedtime. Isn't working very well anymore. So maybe your baby was going to bed relatively easily and now they're starting to fight bedtime, or their bedtime is getting later and later and later due to trying to fit all the naps into the day.
So if you feel like you're constantly moving bedtime later, or you're waking them up from all their naps. Just trying to fit all their naps into the day, and now their day is getting longer and longer just to fit that nap schedule in, then you're most likely on the verge of a nap transition and ready to just drop that last nap altogether.
Same with fighting their bedtime. Similar to naptime, maybe they used to fall asleep quickly for bedtime, and now they're really just rolling around, not falling asleep for quite a long time. You know, 45 minutes later they're still awake, whatever it may be.
When it feels like bedtime is just not ideal any longer, but it used [00:11:00] to work just fine. Then your baby could be getting ready to drop a nap.
Okay, last sign for your baby maybe needing to drop a nap is nighttime sleep. . So your baby was sleeping well at night and it felt like things are working and then suddenly they're having either more nighttime wake up. Or earlier morning wake up. So you may find either A, they're waking more frequently in the night and it's actually harder to get them back to sleep.
They just don't seem as tired. They're taking longer to fall back asleep. Even when you've given them their feed or whatever it is they typically need. You may even. Experience a split night. A split night is really common for an under tired baby, and a split night is when your baby is awake for one long period in the middle of the night.
Let's say your baby slept and then they were awake for one, two or three hours even in the middle of the night, and then they finally fell back asleep and slept the rest of the night. . That can definitely be a sign if you're experiencing it for a while, that your baby is [00:12:00] ready to drop one of their naps.
Same with early morning wake up. So the night is getting shorter. They're waking up earlier in the morning
and they seem okay about it. They seem well rested. They don't seem like you can get them back to sleep. You try and keep things consistent. You try and not get them up too early. You try and get them back to sleep in that early morning. But their morning wake up just keeps getting earlier and earlier, and they're happy and well rested and ready to start their day.
And they're fine to make it to their nap time.
So you kind of feel like nights were working okay. Early mornings were working okay, and now all of a sudden we're experiencing these new things for a couple weeks. It can be time to drop a nap.
So now let's say you've decided yes, absolutely. It is time for my baby to drop a nap, , to make the transition to the next nap schedule. I. How do I do that, right? Some of these transitions are big ones. Sometimes we're asking them to go from staying awake for two to three hours in the morning to four to five hours in the morning if they're dropping to one nap, right?
It's a big deal for some babies. Some babies for nap [00:13:00] transitions are flexible. Some babies aren't as sensitive to extending their wake windows. Others, if they're awake, you know. 15 minutes longer than they typically would've been awake. They might be a little bit of a hot mess, and it can take some time for them to get used to staying up for longer.
So you know, your baby, if you feel like you can go cold Turkey and dropping up and extend their wake windows, great, go for it and try it. But typically, what works best for most babies is a gradual shift of nap times. Okay? So you'll have your baby's current nap schedule.
You'll see where the nap schedule needs to go if you're going to be dropping a nap. And then you can gradually shift their nap times by like 15 minutes a day. So for example, if you have a four month old on four naps a day, and they're awake for 90 minutes in the morning. And you're trying to switch them to three naps a day, which typically means they're awake for two hours in the morning.
The first couple days you might only have them awake an hour 45 in the morning just to get them used to that, and then you might [00:14:00] switch to two hours after a couple days. So you can gradually increase their wake windows or gradually shift their nap times later until you get to that desired nap time.
During the first two or three weeks of the transition, you're gonna have to have a little bit of flexibility, right?
Because your schedule is not going to look perfect for a couple weeks, especially with a gradual transition, and especially because sometimes your baby's not used to staying up longer. They take a shorter nap, they get overtired, they're cranky, they're fussy. This is all really normal in a nap transition, so make sure you stick with it for two or three weeks.
Be flexible. Some of these days you are going to have. All of your baby's naps and maybe a later bedtime, or you're gonna be needing to cap those last naps in order to make sure bedtime's not too late. And then some of these days you're gonna be on the noon nap schedule , where you've dropped that last nap completely.
But we might need a bit of an earlier bedtime that day just because of the way the day has gone, and your baby is still getting used to these [00:15:00] longer weak windows, and we don't wanna push them to like extreme overt tiredness or crankiness, you know, right away.
Of course, crankiness and overt tiredness, , they're gonna happen during this transition. Your baby's body is not used to staying up for longer, so don't worry if that does happen.
Just stay consistent. Give it two or three weeks and I promise on the other side of it , will be a better nap schedule for you.
In the Sleep by Alex membership, there's actually a whole workshop on dropping naps. So if you're curious to hear it actually broken down, . Like if you're dropping from three naps to two naps, here's how it could literally look over a couple weeks if you're dropping naps altogether.
Here's how you transition to quiet time. I break it all down in that workshop. If you're curious, you can always go to the show notes and use the code podcast for 50% off your first month and go watch that, um, workshop.
So just a little recap of a few things to remember. Number one, we do wanna make sure these are age appropriate transitions. Yes, every baby is different. [00:16:00] The ages that I listed at the beginning are not rules or anything that you have to strictly follow, but you do wanna make sure you're in a range
of being age appropriate with your baby's schedule. Number two, these are only signs of dropping a nap , if you are suddenly experiencing them. Okay? Sleep was okay, sleep was looking good, and now suddenly these things are happening. If these signs have sort of always been happening or happening for quite a while, then it might not be time to drop a nap.
You might have something else going on, like a sleep habit or over tiredness or discomfort or some other reason why your baby is struggling with naps. And if you're feeling confused about your baby's nap schedule or you're feeling confused about why they're showing these signs and they've always showed them.
Then please hop onto the Sleep by Alex membership.
Once again, you can use that code podcast for 50% off your first month, and there's no time commitment. You can stay for one month, you can stay for six months, I don't care. But you're gonna have everything in there you need in order to figure out your baby's sleep. From [00:17:00] courses to guides to being able to access me 24 7.
Right? You can send me your messages anytime I reply quickly. And we have five live calls a month, so I'll make sure we get your baby sleep on track in the next few weeks so you don't have to spend your hours Googling and scrolling and listening to shows like this to try and figure out what the heck is going on with my baby's sleep.
Okay, we will just chat in the next couple days and figure it out right away for you.
All right, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in. As always, I appreciate you being here. If you found this episode helpful, please consider leaving a five star review or subscribing to the podcast. This really helps me reach other parents just like you.
As always, have a lovely week. Tune in in the next week or two for hearing all about how the Passy Fairy went. Bye everyone.
